The saddest end is when you have to break up with someone whilst you are still in love with them. It may be for their good, or your own. When, at that moment, you realize, that nothing will ever be the way it was before. They won’t look at you the same way they did the first time you said yes.
It hurts to think of them with someone else. But you think that they will probably find someone better than you.
Everything hurts. The memories, the songs, the call history, the texts, the goodbye. Everything.
You handle it the worst way possible.But deep down, you already knew that it wasn’t meant to be. But these hopes, expectations blurred it away. You know , it needs to end. And so, it did.
This rush, this feeling we get when we are with them fades away. You know you are in love with them, when only their happiness matters. Not yours, not anymore. Even if their happiness doesn’t include you.
After a few months, you realize they are happy without you. They are smiling, and laughing, and enjoying everything while the thoughts at night are keeping you awake.
On some days, the better ones, they are not at the back of your mind. You go to the same places you visited with them, they hurt a little less. You start meeting new people and make new friends. And suddenly, those statuses on social media are not about them anymore. Maybe love was only for that moment. Maybe love wasn’t exactly what is taught to us in movies. Maybe, in that moment, you felt safe. From doubts, insecurities, loneliness. But not every safe place is a home.
Maybe you can still love someone yet not be in love with them anymore.
Maybe I have started to love myself more than I loved them. Maybe, just maybe, I will reach home, soon.
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